By Elaine M. Romero, LMFT, Owner & Clinical Director of Safe Harbor Counseling Center
Compassion fatigue is more than burnout from long hours or stressful deadlines. It is the fatigue that comes from absorbing the emotional experiences of others.
In some fields you are expected to be "present" with people and their pain. You are called to care, guide, teach, listen, affirm, encourage or inspire. These duties can wear you down. When you spend your days caring for others, especially active children or teens, you can feel weighed down by it.
Doctors, nurses, pastors, therapists, first responders, teachers, parents of young children, parents of children with special needs, and caregivers of dependent adults are all likely to experience compassion fatigue.
Compassion fatigue, sometimes called secondary or vicarious trauma, is the emotional and physical exhaustion that leaves you less able to feel empathy or compassion for others. Even the most dedicated people are prone to it.
Signs and symptoms of compassion fatigue
These can come in waves:
Irritability, anger or anxiety
Trouble sleeping, such as insomnia or nightmares
Feeling burdened by the suffering of others
Less fulfillment in your career or life
Isolation
Physical and mental fatigue
Loss of pleasure in life
Trouble concentrating
Bottling up your emotions
Dreading caring for others, then feeling guilty about it
Numbness, hopelessness or powerlessness
Using alcohol or drugs to cope
Poor self-care
Tearfulness
Denial, which can keep you from recognizing the problem and getting help
How to prevent and cope with compassion fatigue
The number one way to prevent or cope with compassion fatigue is knowing that it exists! Learn to recognize it and name it. Think of these symptoms as data, signals telling you it is time to find more balance.
Recognize it. Admit to yourself when you are suffering.
Give yourself permission to be human too.
Practice self-care: exercise, sleep, good food and rest.
Break out of your "box." Change up your routines and go on adventures.
Get into nature. Time outside can help you reset.
Protect your personal time. Schedule time for peace, joy and fun.
Set boundaries. Learn to say no and know your limits. Christ is our model: "Let your yes be yes and your no be no" (Matthew 5:37).
Practice containment. Use visual markers, such as a tree, a statue or prayer, to set down what you carry.
Try mindfulness. Breathing techniques, or RAIN: Recognize, Accept, Investigate, Nurture.
Talk it out. Share with colleagues or peers who support each other, or join a support group.
Get professional help. A counselor can help you recover and find balance again.
Counseling for caregivers and ministry leaders
Caring for others is a calling, and it can wear you down. At Safe Harbor Counseling Center, we offer individual therapy for helpers of every kind, including confidential support for pastors and ministry leaders. We see clients in person in Old Town Temecula and online anywhere in California.
Call 951-252-8411 with questions, or explore our counseling services.